Slaying the pessimist

I’ve always thought Peter was a bit of a schmuck. He’s asked flat out – three times! – if he’s spent the past few years chumming around with Jesus and each time he completely denies it. So I’ve figured I’m doing better than Peter: I’ve never out-right denied that I’m a follower of Jesus like he did. I’ve always been open about who I am and why I live the way I do. I haven’t been ashamed to admit that my relationship with the Father is the single most influential thing in my life. And yet…

I’ve built an entire persona around negativity and skepticism. My initial responses are programmed to be cynical and pessimistic. I’ve hesitated to portray any trace of optimism for fear that I’ll come across naïve and idealistic. So instead, the words that came out of my mouth consistently paint the worst scenario, the most dire of circumstances, the least possible amount of hope. And I’ve carried a reputation for being the unenthusiastic, rain-on-all-parades, Negative Nancy killjoy. This tendency has actually been celebrated as nitty-gritty-real-and-raw insight. And what’s more… I’ve relished in it, fancying myself wise and savvy in a world of silly out-of-touch romantics.

Wow. What an insult that lifestyle is to the work of the cross. What a stupid choice, picking doubt over faith and doom over hope when the message of the gospel is the restoration of all things optimistic. The true reality is more hopeful and positive than I can even grasp on most days. It is a life of inexplicable favor and blessing, a constant opportunity for loud and lavish displays of overwhelming goodness. In short, the gospel justifies all optimism and proves all hope. It enables me to declare favor, protection, and blessing with confidence that my child-of-God status has me primed to receive it all in droves.

So I’m abandoning the old Debbie Downer persona and adopting the ever-positive and expectant stance appropriate for a daughter of the King. And I can’t wait to see how quickly and powerfully God moves when I pave the way with bright-and-shiny joyful expectation.